These are excerpts from actual letters received at the Pension and Compensation Board of the Veterans Bureau in Manila, P.I., after WWII. There are people in every generation who have a difficult time expressing themselves properly, affording others a good laugh. Enjoy!
1. I cannot get sick pay. I have six children. Can you tell me why it is?
2. This is my eighth child. What are you going to do about it?
3. Mrs. Brown has had no clothing for a year and has been visited regularly by the clergy.
4. I have been cohabitating with several officers at headquarters, but without results.
5. I am glad to say that my husband, who was reported missing, is now deceased.
6. Sir, I am forwarding my marriage certificate and my two children, one of which is a mistake, as you can
see.
7. I am writing to say that my baby was born two years old. When do I get the money?
8. Unless I get my husband's money soon, I will be forced to lead an immortal life.
9. I am sending my marriage certificate and six children. I have had seven and one died, which was
baptized on a half sheet of paper by Rev. Thomas.
10. Please find out for certain if my husband is now dead as the man I am living with won't eat or do
anything until he knows for certain.
11. I am very annoyed to think you have branded my oldest boy illiterate. Oh, it is a lie, a dirty lie, as I
married his father a week before he was born.
12. My husband has been put in charge of spittoons, so now do I get more money?
13. In answer to your letter, I have given birth to a boy weighing ten pounds. I hope this is satisfactory.
14. You have changed my little boy to a little girl. Will it make any difference?
15. Please send my money at once as I need it badly; as I have fallen into error with my landlady.
16. I have no children yet. My husband is a bus driver and works day and night.
17. In accordance with your instructions, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope.
18. I want my money as quickly as you can send it. I have been in bed with the Doctor for two weeks and
he doesn't seem to be doing me so much good. If things don't improve, I will have to send for another
doctor.
11/26/11
lol....It would be interesting, if it were possible, to find out what the circumstances were around some of these sentences....funny how words can say so many things, at the same time. Pretty good....funny. Thanks....I needed that.
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